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PseudoPod 357: Growth Spurt

PseudoPod 357: Growth Spurt is a PseudoPod original.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 33:59 — 23.4MB)

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Growth Spurt

by Paul Lorello

Day 1 – UPS delivered them today in an envelope and inside that was a pouch like Pop Rocks. I closed the blinds and the curtains and it was real dark and I couldn’t hardly read the instructions. I tore open the pouch and poured this stuff like sand into the tank. I’d made a cool cover for it taking the box it came in and cutting off the top and painting inside it like black. It’s cool. They said to just put them in the dark but if you have a cover that’s better. I fed them with one of the freeze dried blood caps that was included but I think I added too much water. I hate it that I screwed stuff up right at the beginning. I’ll know by tomorrow night I guess.

Mom and Dad are yelling at each other. They think I can’t hear them.

Day 2 – I guess I didn’t add too much water after all. There are only seven caps included in the kit. After a week I start them on real food. Grace’s hamster is preggers. Good snacks for my guys coming soon.

I got made fun of for writing everything down. Grace and Mom ganged up on me. And they laughed when I told them every scientist writes stuff down. Then Grace said I wasn’t a scientist. Then Dad came home and everyone stopped laughing.

I want my guys to grow already. Under “Gestation Period” it says you should see results in about two weeks. Two weeks is waaayyyyyy too long!

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EA Fundraiser – Montreal

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:19 — 1.0MB)

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HELLO ALL!

Craig Mackie is holding a fund-raiser for ESCAPE ARTISTS in Montreal this Friday, October 25, 2013.

There will be live readings of weird fiction by Eric Lis, Marta Barnes, Gregg Chamberlin, Dean Garlick and Rob Kimsey. By Donation. A fund-raiser for three fantastic sister podcasts: Pseudopod, Podcastle and Escape Pod.

https://www.facebook.com/events/255534427929123/?ref_dashboard_filter=calendar

Please check it out if you can!

Shawn Garrett
Editor, Pseudopod

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PseudoPod 356: The Night Wire

“The Night Wire” first appeared in the September, 1926 issue of Weird Tales.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 24:54 — 17.2MB)

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The Night Wire

by H.F. Arnold

There is something ungodly about these night wire jobs. You sit up here on the top floor of a skyscraper and listen in to the whispers of a civilization. New York, London, Calcutta, Bombay, Singapore — they’re your next-door neighbors after the streetlights go dim and the world has gone to sleep.

Alone in the quiet hours between two and four, the receiving operators doze over their sounders and the news comes in. Fires and disasters and suicides. Murders, crowds, catastrophes. Sometimes an earthquake with a casualty list as long as your arm. The night wire man takes it down almost in his sleep, picking it off on his typewriter with one finger.

Once in a long time you prick up your ears and listen. You’ve heard of some one you knew in Singapore, Halifax or Paris, long ago. Maybe they’ve been promoted, but more probably they’ve been murdered or drowned. Perhaps they just decided to quit and took some bizarre way out. Made it interesting enough to get in the news.

But that doesn’t happen often. Most of the time you sit and doze and tap, tap on your typewriter and wish you were home in bed.

Sometimes, though, queer things happen. One did the other night, and I haven’t got over it yet. I wish I could. (Continue Reading…)

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EA Metacast, October 2013

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 44:51 — 30.9MB)

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An urgent update on the status of Escape Artists, its three podcasts, our plans for the future and why we desperately need your help getting there.

Escape Artists, Inc.
P.O. Box 83
Woodstock, GA 30188

Additional music provided by D-Form – http://www.reverbnation.com/dform
Sound effects provided by users kasa90 (http://freesound.org/people/kasa90/) and TasmanianPower (http://freesound.org/people/TasmanianPower/) of FreeSound.org

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PseudoPod 355: The Chair

PseudoPod 355: The Chair is a PseudoPod original.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 23:30 — 16.2MB)

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The Chair

by Leah Thomas

Gus accidentally crushed his wife’s cochlea during breakfast.

The spiraling piece of inner ear was almost the exact same shade of beige as the tablecloth his Great Aunt had given them at their wedding; Gwen couldn’t have expected him to spot it when he set down the jar of marmalade. She should have left the cochlea in her earhole where it belonged, but she had taken to removing it while she slept and only jamming it back into the side of her skull again moments before stumbling out the door on her way to the unemployment office.

The dislocated eardrum emitted the strangest sound as it was flattened, like the squeaking of fingertips against dry teeth.

The naked bones of Gwen’s knuckles clicked when she lifted the jar. Although neither of her eyesockets — one an echoing black hole, the other occupied by a myopic, amber-irised eyeball — were framed by brows or lids, and although she could not afford a crinkled forehead, Gus could read the expression on her skull as easily as he could any face with a complete set of features. Had her tear glands not been on layaway, she might have wept. Had her nose been more than a few strips of cartilage, she may have sniffled.

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PseudoPod 354: The Eulogy Of Darien Meek

PseudoPod 354: The Eulogy Of Darien Meek is a PseudoPod original.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 24:58 — 17.2MB)

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Show Notes

Music under Shawn’s message is “Happy Birthday Chopin Ballade” by Mario Ajero, from Music Alley.

The Eulogy Of Darien Meek

by Niccolo Skill

“Thank you for coming,” the usher said and held the door for the latest guest. Tom nodded and mouthed a ‘thank you’ but didn’t feel it in him to say the actual words. A time and place for everything, after all.

Twin dark wood doors opened up to a high-ceiling-ed main room. The windows were stained half the colors of the rainbow. The room was awash in vibrant reds, oranges, and yellows. A splash of green dotted the refreshment table and the faintest lines of blue hung over the altar. A faint musky smell, not quite strong enough to be offensive, wafted out the door.

Clusters of relatives milled about, exchanging the usual family gossip. Tom tucked himself into the corner by the restrooms.

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PseudoPod 353: FLASH ON THE BORDERLANDS XVII: Keeping Up Appearances

PseudoPod 353: FLASH ON THE BORDERLANDS XVII: Keeping Up Appearances is a PseudoPod original.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 36:45 — 25.3MB)

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Show Notes

Things are not always as they seem…

Help Gail Carriger get CRUDRAT up and running by checking out: CRUDRAT!

Interstitial music is “Fearless Bleeder” by Chimpy, from Music Alley.

“Down By The Sea Near The Great Big Rock” first appeared in MASQUES (1984).

“The Demon Fields” has been performed in San Diego, and can be found at Gchatus, but Pseudopod is its first published appearance.

A shorter version of “Pawn” was a Semifinalist in the 2010 Escape Pod flash contest, where it was titled “Queen.”

“Down By The Sea Near The Great Big Rock” by Joe R. Lansdale

Down by the sea near the great big rock, they made their camp and toasted marshmallows over a small, fine fire. The night was pleasantly chill and the sea spray cold. Laughing, talking, eating the gooey marshmallows, they had one swell time; just them, the sand, the sea and the sky, and the great big rock.  (Continue Reading…)

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PseudoPod 351: The Blues

PseudoPod 351: The Blues is a PseudoPod original.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 30:30 — 21.0MB)

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Show Notes

“The Blues” was my attempt at confronting and ruminating on the limits of our adaptability, something not often addressed in apocalyptic literature.

Slusher music is “Green Olives” by Barbacoa from Music Alley

The Blues

by Cameron Suey

The brick edifices lean over me, red canyons of abandoned history. Despite the lingering warmth of the late valley summer, dried leaves are already piling in the gutters. Without a human hand to clean them I imagine them heaping up, year after year, burying the small town in an endless leaf pile, patiently waiting in vain for a child to leap into them.

Spun off on this chain of images and ideas, I drift away from Alex and lean against the boarded windows of a storefront. The leaves are swirling now with the blues in my mind, the cool colors crackling through the warm autumn refuse. Somewhere in the middle of the conceptual whirlwind, I get sick, the bile rising from the back of my throat bringing an unpleasant fungal taste. I spit as my mouth floods with thin and bitter saliva.

‘Tell me if I can help, man.’

Alex is across the street, leaning against a bike rack, watching me. I try to shake my head, to raise an arm, but I am trapped inside the whirlwind, not sure of its boundaries and borders, not sure if I am enjoying this anymore. Leif and King’s distant, muffled voices blend into the spinning vortex.

‘Nope,’ I manage with great effort. Alex nods and looks away.