PseudoPod 357: Growth Spurt

Growth Spurt

by Paul Lorello

Day 1 – UPS delivered them today in an envelope and inside that was a pouch like Pop Rocks. I closed the blinds and the curtains and it was real dark and I couldn’t hardly read the instructions. I tore open the pouch and poured this stuff like sand into the tank. I’d made a cool cover for it taking the box it came in and cutting off the top and painting inside it like black. It’s cool. They said to just put them in the dark but if you have a cover that’s better. I fed them with one of the freeze dried blood caps that was included but I think I added too much water. I hate it that I screwed stuff up right at the beginning. I’ll know by tomorrow night I guess.

Mom and Dad are yelling at each other. They think I can’t hear them.

Day 2 – I guess I didn’t add too much water after all. There are only seven caps included in the kit. After a week I start them on real food. Grace’s hamster is preggers. Good snacks for my guys coming soon.

I got made fun of for writing everything down. Grace and Mom ganged up on me. And they laughed when I told them every scientist writes stuff down. Then Grace said I wasn’t a scientist. Then Dad came home and everyone stopped laughing.

I want my guys to grow already. Under “Gestation Period” it says you should see results in about two weeks. Two weeks is waaayyyyyy too long!

About the Author

Paul Lorello

PAUL LORELLO is a freelance writer living on Long Island, and would like you to know that he doesn’t let it get to him. His influences are Ray Bradbury, Harlan Ellison, Theodore Sturgeon, and Richard Matheson. His story, “Last Will of Little Rosie,” will be appearing in the upcoming Big Pulp KENNEDY CURSE anthology.

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About the Narrator

Steve Anderson 

Steve Anderson has lost track of just how many stories he’s narrated for Escape Pod, PodCastle, and PseudoPod (which includes a Parsec Award-winning story for PseudoPod). When he’s not behind the microphone, he produces animated explainer videos at, and he performs original live storytelling programs at

Find more by Steve Anderson