Man Eat Man

by Mike Irwin

The Dumpster Kid is already recounting the tally behind Uncle Sam to make sure that there’s no foul play. When they finish the first vote, he puffs out his chest and in a slightly deeper voice says, ‘Now all those against.’ Again the two go competitively counting heads.

‘Sixteen for.’ Sam says

‘Sixteen against.’ The Kid corrects.

Look at that Corinne: your glass is half full, or half empty that is.

‘So do I shoot her?’ Miller asks.

Uncle Sam shrugs and says, ‘It’s a tie.’ Then she turns to face me, my fat head a dark, inhuman red as I struggle to keep the door closed against the increasing intensity of your attacks. ‘Shoot, only one who didn’t vote was you.’

And just like that, the rest of your life is in my hands.