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The Devil Inside
by Shannon Connor Winward
Your Guest Host this week is Nicole Suddeth who slaves away in the fiction mines at Pseudopod as an associate editor.
‘What do you mean by that, Rebecca?’ the doctor queried. ‘What did no one tell you?’
Becca studied the drops of rain on the window, little falling jewels of light.
She felt evil, just saying it. ‘I read all the books. They warn you about everything that can go wrong. Preeclampsia. Preemies. Feeding problems. But no one tells you what to do when you don’t love your baby. Like it’s … unthinkable.’
Her words hung for a time, as Dr. Marsh scribbled on his pad. ‘It’s quite common. Many women experience post-partum depression …’
‘I’m not depressed, I just don’t love him.’
‘Why is that, do you think?’
Why? Because he didn’t love her back? Because he cried? All the time, always, screeching until his little voice cracked. Because Becca couldn’t cry?
‘I just don’t feel it,’ she murmured.