PseudoPod 527: We Are Not These Bodies, Strung Between The Stars

by A.C. Wise

 

“We Are Not These Bodies, Strung Between the Stars” originally appeared in WHISPERS FROM ABYSS 2. This story is set in the same universe as Venice Burning, which was podcast on Pseudopod in 2013

A.C. WISE‘s short fiction has appeared in Clarkesworld, Apex, Shimmer, and the Year’s Best Dark Fantasy and Horror 2015, among other places. The podcast version of her story Final Girl Theory, which appeared at Pseudopod, was a finalist for the 2013 Parsec Awards. Her debut collection, THE ULTRA FABULOUS GLITTER SQUADRON SAVES THE WORLD AGAIN was published by Lethe Press in October 2015. Her second short fiction collection THE KISSING BOOTH GIRL AND OTHER STORIES was published by Lethe Press in the October, 2016. In addition to her fiction, she co-edits Unlikely Story, and contributed a monthly Women to Read Column to SF Signal. Find her online at A.C. Wise.com.

Voice artist and premier William Hartnell voice actor – Siobhan Gallichan – is one of those people who actually loves Marmite. Give. Her. Work! The Gearnobz show will be starting in a month or so… keep an eye on social media for it… And coming in 2017, Doctor Who – The First Doctor Missing Stories!


Pseudopod wants to direct your attention to a project by one of our Authors, Greg Stolze. This is a good time to go back and relisten to episode 317, Enzymes.

YOU is a novel, set in the universe of the democratic horror game Unknown Armies, which pits readers against a book that hates them while situating them in the person of a middle-aged businessman named Leo Evans.

Leo is divorced, a fan of racquet sports, and a cultist of the Necessary Servant—a quasi-religion he freely admits seems silly, except for the way it grants him extra senses and paranormal abilities. The chief cultist, however, is his ex-wife, and the two of them clash over a key question of what it means to truly “serve” with integrity.

In the process of hashing all this out, Leo must survive a couple attempts on his life, come to grips with an enchantment that makes him hate the person he previously loved most, and deal with lingering issues between himself and his son.

This novel is Kickstarting in February, check the trailer at www.gregstolze.com/you


Info on Anders Manga’s album (they do our theme music!) can be found here.


“I’m one of the ones who remembers what it was like before R’lyeh rose. Before New Orleans sank. Before Venice burned. When Mi Go first screamed through the space between the stars, and when Shoggoths last in the dooryard bloomed. For the record, it doesn’t make me one of the lucky ones.”

PseudoPod 526: The Great American Nightmare

by Moaner T. Lawrence

“The Great American Nightmare” is a PSEUDOPOD original.

“One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors.” – Plato

“They who can give up essential liberty for temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety.” – Benjamin Franklin

In addition to being a regular contributor to the world’s largest horror publication, Rue Morgue: Horror In Culture & Entertainment (and a member of their Rue Crew) MOANER T. LAWRENCE is also a regular contributor to Germany’s largest horror publication, VIRUS. He last appeared on Pseudopod with “Bad Newes From New England” and can be followed on Twitter, Facebook, Wattpad, and a new wordpress called The Horror In Blog.

Your narrator – John Bell – is an Award winning writer/producer of radio commercials as well as all-around go-to voice talent. Has written/produced 160 episodes of the comedy podcast, “Bell’s in the Batfry”. Catch Bell’s in the Batfry at the usual subscription locations (iTunes, et al) and/or at the link.


Info on Anders Manga’s album (they do our theme music!) can be found here.


“The sky over 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue was clear and blue at 12:00PM EST on Friday, January 20th, 2017. At 12:01, a fleet of Secret Service byakhee swarmed over the abstract visage of what was once The White House. Faster and faster, they beat their jet black wings, until the unholy force tore a hole in the sky. It became a swirling vortex, and the composer Erich Zann, considered missing for over 120 years, began conducting a chorus of six-foot albino penguins, alongside the United States Marine Band to a discordant rendition of Hail, Columbia. Opposite the band, a crowd of three million attendants held fast to a double-reinforced security railing, or anything else they could grab onto, so as to bear witness to the spectacle before them without being sucked into the portal forming above.”

PseudoPod 487: Inky, Blinky, Pinky, Nyarlathotep

by Nick Mamatas

NICK MAMATAS is the author of several novels, including the Bukowskiesque zombie novel THE LAST WEEKEND and the murder-mystery at a Lovecraft convention title I AM PROVIDENCE. His short fiction has appeared in Best American Mystery Stories, Lovecraft’s Monsters, BLACK WINGS II, FUTURE LOVECRAFT, and FUNGI, the journal of revolutionary letters known as SALVAGE, and many other venues. He is also published by Wildside Press – check them out!

“Inky, Blinky, Pinky, Nyarlathotep” originally appeared in FUTURE LOVECRAFT, by Innsmouth Free Press and later when Prime Books reprinted the entire anthology.

Cheyenne Wright is a freelance illustrator and concept artist. He is the color artist on the three-time Hugo Award winning steampunk graphic novel series Girl Genius, and co-creator of many other fine works; Including 50 Fathoms and the Ennie award winning Deadlands Noir for the Savage Worlds RPG. He has also produced graphics for Star Trek Online, the Champions MMO, and t-shirt designs for T.V.’s Alton Brown.

Cheyenne lives in Seattle with his wife, their daughter, and an ever growing stack of unpainted miniatures. In his spare time he is teaching himself animation, and narrates short stories for a variety of audio anthologies where he is known as Podcasting’s Mr. Buttery ManVoice ™

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Newspace was a lot like old space. Well, posters of old space stacked atop one another and constantly shuffled and re-shuffled. In the little waffle-iron spacecraft was the thunderous Niagara, any number of mansions on emerald hills, all piled up in a corner with Escheresque staircases going downwise and anti-spinward, marmalade skies and airships in the shape of giant, open-mouthed fish, the Pyramids of Egypt poking out from every horizon, and long, dark hallways in blue-and-purple neon everywhere, absolutely everywhere, as this is what the New Ones thought VR would look like, back when they were all children.

And the New Ones had fun playing like children. As it turns out, virtually all problems faced by Humanity, save the million-year war with the Old Ones, were resource problems. No Old Ones, no resources, no problems. Virtually no problems, anyway, which is an awful pun, it’s true. So, the New Ones spent their days naked and immortal, writing songs no fleshy ear could comprehend, inventing new languages to describe disembodied emotional states, engaging in virtual nucleic exchange and reproducing wildly to the humming databases, with beings unheard of and indescribable.

The waffle iron was busy, too. Zipping around space and whatnot, eating dark matter and printing copies of itself, in case something happened to it. And oh, yes, something was happening to it. Naturally, the poor little waffle iron didn’t quite understand that the something happening was the drive to laze-lathe meteoroids into replicas of itself. Oh, and then, within the guts of the waffle iron, ghosts started showing up everywhere, upsetting and terrifying the New Ones with their googly eyes and their siren howls. And they loved to eat the New Ones. Beautiful, tow-headed, pink children with cloth diapers and bows in their wispy hair. Lovely children with rich, brown skin and smiles to light up a room. Obnoxious children who sat on the couch all day, pretending to kill with their minds for fun. Children who flailed their hands about and slammed their heads against the wall because they saw the wrong kind of penny. Ghosts were indiscriminate—the ugly and the exquisite both were consumed, leaving naught but wrinkled husks behind.

You have to realize that words like eyes and children, and even husks, make little sense; it’s being dumbed down for you and the quaint bag of chemical reactions you keep in that bone bowl. We’re talking a density matrix, here. So, when a character is introduced, as one is about to be, understand that you’d be just as accurate, were you to imagine her as a blurry, yellow ball of light floating around in a black field, instead of as a person. Which is to say, you’d be much more accurate, after all.

Pseudopod 443: Watchers

by Lavie Tidhar

“Watchers” was originally published in World War Cthulhu, ed. Jonathan Oliver, publisher: Cubicle 7, 2013.  “Very little of this is made up. The coastwatchers on Leserser were there  as described – as was I, half a century later.”

Lavie Tidhar is the World Fantasy and British Fantasy Award winning author of Osama, The Violent Century and many other novels, novellas and short fiction. His new novel, A Man Lies Dreaming, was published by Hodder in the UK in October. His comics mini-series ADLER came out from Titan Comics at the end of 2014.

The story is narrated by Robert Gonyo. Robert A. K. Gonyo is a theatre director, actor, voiceover artist, and musician residing in Queens, New York, and the producer and host of the “Go See a Show!” podcast, which you can find on iTunes. Horror fans in New York City can see him perform weekly in End Times Productions’ “The Ded Sullivan Show,” Saturday nights at Times Scare — visit robertgonyo.com for more information, and discounted tickets.

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1.

The city is buried deep under the South Pacific ocean, and that is all I want to tell you about it.

In 1942 South Pacific Command was established on the island of New Caledonia following the hurried departure of its French colonial administration. Nouvelle Caledonie, unlike the other islands of Melanesia, was not volcanic. It was, in fact, the sole remnant of an entire sunken continent called Zealandia, a fragment of the once-mighty Gondwanaland.

There had been monsters on New Caledonia, before humans came. Meiolania, a giant horned turtle, two and a half meters long with an elongated skull and multiple horns protruding from of it. Or the Sylviornis, an almost two meters tall, flightless bird with a long reptilian tail. Or the enormous, armoured Mekosuchus crocodiles.

Real monsters, all of them. But when the humans came, when the ancient Lapita people crossed the ocean in their giant canoes, they settled the islands, and they killed the monsters.

I was not in New Caledonia. I was with III Island Command, first on Espiritu Santo and then on Vanua Lava, in the islands of the New Hebrides.

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Sounds used in this episode: