Flash: Why I Hate Cake

By Paul Mannering

Read by Alasdair Stuart

We ate things on dares too. A particular favorite was the larvae of a winged beetle called the Huhu Bug. These grubs grow to about the size of your thumb and they eat dead wood so they taste almost exactly like peanut butter doesn’t.

I always liked to fry mine first, having seen a friend run around screaming with one of these blind maggots attached to his lip with its wood munching mandibles when he tried to eat one raw.

01
November 22nd, 2007 2:23 pm

I didn’t know where this one was going, but when the punchline hit me, it was like a gross, moldy ton of bricks. Very disgusting. A+!

02
November 23rd, 2007 2:33 am

Hideously wonderful. Seriously. Perfect for Thanksgiving!

03
Jen
November 23rd, 2007 9:46 pm

I listened to this on the way to Thanksgiving dinner. I was very relieved when dessert was pumpkin pie. Loved this story.

04
Dave
November 24th, 2007 1:37 pm

I almost had a wreck when the truth was revealed. I kept saying, “Oh tell me this didn’t really happen!”

So please…tell me this didn’t happen. PLEASE!

Great story and delivery. Thanks!

D

05
Sparky
November 26th, 2007 1:05 am

I sat here listening with my face “squeenched” and my guts ready to make an exit. Keerist! What a helluva story.

06
phignewton
November 29th, 2007 7:00 am

whuuuuuuuuut.. i dont geeeeeeeet it, what was the point of that one? just a wonderfully tasty tale of seruptitious holiday brunching. snerk!

07
jazzmodeus
November 29th, 2007 10:45 am

Damn you, Pseudopod. The punchline snuck right up on me too. Horribly well done.

08
Spork
December 2nd, 2007 1:05 pm

Gross-out as horror? Meh.

09
KiraLAAA
December 15th, 2007 3:41 pm

best flash ever!
loved it!
I told all my friends in my high school about it and now they call me a “freak”.
lovely.

10
Stijn Hommes
December 26th, 2007 9:44 am

I can’t believe that ending snuck up on me.
I totally agree with the others. This was too gross for words…. Yuck!

11
scatterbrain
March 24th, 2008 9:09 pm

Jesus…similar to a time I drunk a bottle of old ice tea with mold ‘discs’ floating in it.

12
Mari Mitchell
March 29th, 2008 12:07 pm

EWE!

13
Brilliant.
April 4th, 2008 8:08 am

Thank you.